The women who come to me for coaching generally have one thing in common.  They realize that they are packing around old emotional baggage and it is negatively affecting the quality of their lives.

How do you know when you are the owner of emotional baggage?  Some possible clues:

• If other people push your buttons… you have the buttons… you have baggage
• If you are angry a lot… you have baggage
• If you cry a lot… you have baggage
• If you feel sorry for yourself…. you have baggage
• If you hold grudges… you have baggage
• If you have resentments… you have baggage
• If you have addictions… you have baggage
• If you feel bad about yourself… you have baggage
• If you have a critical nature… you have baggage

Let’s see… have I left anyone out?  lol… the point is… Baggage is a by-product of growing up… we are imperfect humans, being raised by imperfect humans in an imperfect world.

I have certainly owned my share of emotional baggage in my life.  My suitcases were crammed with stuff that was passed down from my parents… stuff that I had picked up along the way… it was old, it was negative and it was very heavy…

But… and this is the Big But… I opened all the suitcases… inventoried every item… appraised it’s value… trashed what was junk… fixed what was broken… handed back what didn’t even belong to me… and lightened my load…

That’s my definition of personal work… “Doing an Inventory and Doing the Clean Up.”

Note: Dr. Christiane Northrop said in general that the women who struggle a lot emotionally with PMS and Menopause are the ones with unresolved emotional issues.  She says that the hormonal changes that happen at these times in a woman’s life amplify the emotional impact of the issues. The more emotionally clear women are the less they tend to struggle. I agree… based on my own experience and that of the women I support.

I would love you thoughts and feedback.

As always,

Joyce

Let me know if you need some help.  I have walked this path myself and walked beside many others as well.

Contact Joyce

The wheel of the year has turned yet again, and the days are getting noticeably shorter. 2009 is more than half over.

The older I get, the more precious time is, and the more intent I become on living my life to it’s fullest.  I want to be happy, I see anything other than happiness a complete waste of my beautiful life. 

On that note, I would like to present you with a coaching challenge.

Remember to do this in a spirit of celebration, let go of the outcome, and just enjoy the process…

Challenge:

Take the time to sit today with a cup of tea and your journal and create a list of your highlights from the first half of 2009.

• What did you accomplish?
• Who did you love?
• What brought you joy?
• What did you learn?
• How did you grow?
• What were your special moments?

Take the time to look back with love… keep these snippets of “feel – good” energy close to you, think of them often.

Advanced Challenge: Up the voltage on the good energy.

If you really want to invite more goodness into your circumstances, pass this challenge to other select folks in you life.   Make it a point to talk about these loving things when you visit…

• What you think is what you feel
• What you feel is what you vibrate
• What you vibrate is what you attract

Take time to think about the love you have and share…

Use the Law of Attraction to invite more and more reasons to celebrate into your reality.

Isn’t it great how this works?

Peace and Love,

Joyce

For some reason, I had a grumpy day yesterday… could be hormones (smack dab in the middle of menopause), could be the weather (cold, rainy, dark grey day), could be… could be… could be…

What ever the cause… the result was one ‘grumpy’ Joyce… the storm clouds had gathered in my attitude and I saw everything through the lens of grump…

Circumstances that would normally not even be a bump in my usual cheerful path, were causing me to stub my toe… I felt itchy all day…

Now… knowing what I know about focusing on the negative and inviting more in to feel negative about… I pulled a couple of tools from my vast Law of Attraction tool kit and limply waved them around… but I wasn’t in the mood to be cheered up…

My mood wasn’t due to anything serious… I knew that ‘this too shall pass‘… so I just kept my mouth closed for containment.  I wasn’t about to make it worse and have anyone else affected by it.  That is one of the most common mistakes people make.  They inflict upon others.  If you take nothing else away from this story… that is the nugget… Don’t inflict your grumpy mood on anyone else!

Instead, I chose to take care of myself.

• I had a nap on the couch after dinner
• I chose to let the answering machine handle a couple of calls from friends (I wouldn’t have been good company anyway)
• I had a bath
• I went to bed early

The result:

I had a great sleep, today brought a blue sky, I feel refreshed, no harm was done… and no one is the wiser… I have another tool in my toolkit…

The moral of the story:

“Sometimes a grumpy day is just a grumpy day”… no big deal… it feels lousy to be in the middle of one, but they often sort themselves out if they are just left alone.

Own it… take care of yourself and let it go…

However… If there is one after another after another… that’s different… something needs to change, to be resolved…

If you are having grumpy day after grumpy day and want help creating changes… Contact me… I can help you with your tool kit…

Wishing you a lovely day…

Joyce

Good Morning,

I was talking to my good friend yesterday about her struggles with her Mom.  For her own reasons, Mom is highly critical and unnaccepting of my friend.  I have known this friend for almost 15 years and she is bright, accomplished, talented and kind… the kind of daughter I would be proud to have…

My friend’s Mom obviously has her own emotional buttons and baggage that she needs to deal with, however, looking down the road, there doesn’t seem to be any indication that she intends to do any inner work.  My friend just keeps looking for tools to help reach a healthy relationship with her unhealthy Mother…

I know women who are bright, talented, accomplished and loving who:

• really struggle with negative body images
• have eating disorders (various forms)
• drink too much (some to dull the pain, some to dull the passion)
• are control freaks
• have various addictions
• pick lousy partners
• have childish behaviors
• have lives and relationships fraught with conflict

I could go on and on…

What I’ve noticed is this:  We all seem to have one sponsoring issue that weaves itself though our lives…often the origins are deeper than the issue…

For instance:

• My own eating disorder (issue) evolved as a way to cope with the turmoil in my growing up
• A woman may drink too much as a way to numb herself to the disappointment she has in her heart for the lifestyle she feels trapped in
• The control freak may need to have everything perfect in order to feel safe.  Her childhood was chaotic, unpredictable and she never felt safe.  She overcompensates by micro-managing everything and everyone around her
• The woman who picks lousy partners has her own story to tell. Her behavior makes sense too
• The woman who behaves like a child, had an emotional trauma when she was young and got stuck

We are all the logical by-product of our circumstances.  Can we change if we want to?  Absolutely.  My own eating disorder doesn’t run my life anymore.  I’ve done my work… My friend who is a control freak is doing her inner work to trust the universe and loosen her corset a bit… The woman who picks lousy partners is staying out of relationships while she grows her own loving relationship with herself…

So, the moral to this writing is… it’s ok to have issues… we all do… find a non-shaming person or group that allows you to own your story and take responsibility for doing your inner work.  Then like Nike says:  “Just Do It”

Some women never do get around to doing their inner work, to healing, forgiving, changing… some women never access the culture and language of change… that’s their right… we can’t create in someone else’s reality.

“Bless them… change me”  My evolution is my responsibility, yours is yours…

So… what’s your issue?

Note:

If this opens a pocket of awareness for you that seems too big to face alone… I just want you to know, I can help you.  I have years of experience with my own inner work and supporting others in planning theirs.  I can help you make sense of your baggage, plan your path and inner work, walk beside you as you do do your inner work, hold your hand or point you in the right direction if you need support beyond my skills.

If you want to talk to me about specific life issue coaching go to:   http://joyceleelifecoach.com/contact/

Brightest Blessings to you on your path… you are obviously taking responsibility for your happiness or you wouldn’t be reading this… ))

Joyce

Good Morning,

So, here we are… another day is stretched out before us…

Before we look at our self in the mirror again, let’s take a moment to think about the quality of observations we will make to the woman who is looking back at…

Will we criticize and judge her negatively, or will we smile and tell her that we are grateful and that we are glad to be her?

What will we plan to eat today? Have we given thought to balanced, nutritious meals for our self and our family?  Does the food that we keep in the house support a healthy food plan?

Our personal care: Are we going to take the time to dress and present our self in a way that feels good and self loving today?  Do we have self care products that make a positive statement about the care we think we deserve?

Money Matters: Will we respect our finances today?  Will we make wise choices that feel empowering?

Will we make time for some personal inner work? Time to connect with our Spirituality?  Time just for us…  or will we give it all away…

Here’s the thing… the better we treat our self, the better we will feel… the better we feel, the more we have to share with others… it’s the quintessential win-win…

I’m on my way to smile at the woman in the mirror…

Joyce

Good Morning…

Here is a nifty exercise that I like to do every day.  I would like to offer it to you…

It’s simple… Pick a word… any word… this word will keep you focused and anchored as you walk through this day…

You will know it when you see it… you can’t make a mistake with this exercise… and the great thing is… you get to pick another one tomorrow… how about that?

Serenity, Spirit, Inspiration, Peace, Love, Joy, Choice, Power, Friendliness, Share, Cherish, Appreciate, Laugh, Smile, Truth, Surrender, Tickle, Tease, Hug, Grace, Poise, Confidence, Worth, Value, Esteem, Acceptance, Create, Support, Communicate, Clarity, Positive, Dream, Deserve, Honesty, Passion, Health, Wellness, Grounded, Centered, Abundance, Receive, Blessings, Gratitude, Thanks, Manners, Authentic, Awakened, Empowered, Sage, Generous, Affirm, Approval, Acceptance, Tolerance, Patience, Connecting, Relax, Soft, Open, Flowing, Relax, Let It Be, Chill Out…

Pick one from the list that resonates with you or pick one of your own… the important thing is that you choose a positive lens through which to view your world…  you create what you choose…

Developing a Health Body Image seems to be a perennial topic.  Many of the women I talk to are either struggling with or hoping to cultivate a more positive body image.

So…

• How are you feeling about your body this week?
• How are you feeling about your body today?

When was the last time you set an intention to ditch your mean inner critic, and adopt a kinder and gentler way of talking to yourself.  Have you looked in the mirror today yet and smiled at the beautiful woman looking back?  Do you see yourself in a photograph and love your body/temple?

Loving yourself is a daily… sometimes hourly… heck, sometimes moment by moment decision… It is so easy to drift away from a positive intention and revert back to the familiar… even when the familiar is self-abusive…

I am lighting my morning candle for you and your positive relationship with your body image today… When you love yourself, all manner of goodness will flow to you… open your self… open your heart and allow….

open and allowing… it doesn’t get better than that…

Enjoy your body today… be grateful for your physical blessings… treat her well… feed her health-full foods, give her enough water to drink, let her rest, let her move and be active…

Namaste

Want some support as you walk towards the self-loving body image you yearn for?  My new ebook, Intimate Time With The Woman In The Mirror: the essential creative journal companion, has a whole section of relfective journal prompts to help you shift your perspective to one of appreciation and gratitude and possibility…

You can order the ebook at http://joyceleelifecoach.com/intimate-time/

PS:  I have a lot of experience with cultivating a positive body image.  As a Empowerment Life Coach, I can help you if you are ready to start loving your self, and your body/temple.

Contact me for a short complimentary discovery session.

It’s Monday… (I can hear the moaning already…)

Whatever you do with your day, you are serving. Whether you are cleaning rooms in a hotel, or are an executive director somewhere, people will be affected by what you do.  People will also be affected by the energy you put out as you do it.

How can I serve?

• A job done with a willing and generous spirit carries positive energy.
• A job done grudgingly or with apathy carries negative energy.

You add positive, apathetic, or negative energy to the world each time you act.

Make sure you put positive loving energy into your service today.  It really does matter…

Just start with feeling good yourself.  Be kind to yourself.  Be mindfully grateful for your many blessings… get your self revved up about another opportunity to experience this wonderful life you have been gifted with.

Isn’t that a better deal than moaning your way through the day?

Perk yourself up vibrationally, decide to have a positive interaction with everyone you come into contact with today.  Decide to focus of happy thoughts… sounds like a cliche but it holds true…

I’m serving with love today.

Tootles…

Joyce Lee

I grew up in a family where:

• Children were to be seen and not heard
• We were told not to get “too big for our britches”
• We were supposed to downplay our accomplishments
• We were not taught to receive compliments graciously

Like many others, I had to learn how to step up and show my gifts and creativity publicly.  I had to learn how to be ‘right-sized’…  (not bigger than I am, but also… not smaller, either)

Here’s the thing we all know

• We are all given gifts and talents by our Divine Higher Power.
• We are supposed to share these gifts and talents with the world… (that’s a good thing for everyone isn’t it?)
• To minimize our talents and gifts is disrespectful to the Giver of the gifts.

So… today is my day to share my latest creative project for the first time… I am tootling my bugle… I am stepping into the spotlight… I am clearing my throat… I’m making an announcement… ))

~~~Introducing~~~

Intimate Time With The Woman In The Mirror

the essential creative journal companion

How would you like to learn the inspired journal recipes Joyce uses to create her rich inner life?  It’s all in her Intimate Time With the Woman In The Mirror: the essential creative journal companion.

I want you to enjoy a lifetime of deeply satisfying adventures with the friend at the end of your pen.

For more yummy details – click here!

**********************************************************************************

Epilogue:  “You are ~ I am” a gift to the world.  There is only “one of you ~ one of me”.  Let’s share!

Namaste

Good Morning,

I was just thinking about what contributes to ‘feel good’ day for me… I love hugs, and ‘I love you’ and teasing and attention.  My day just goes better when there is loving expression.

I realize that I need to take the time to extend my loving energy to others as well.

• tell others what I appreciate about them
• go out of my way to inquire about them
• listen, really listen to what others have to say
• take the time to joke around… life is supposed to be fun
• touch…  merging energy creates sparks…
• surprise people with interest for no other reason than to let them know they are important to me
• make time for chit chat… quit taking myself seriously…
• go out of my way for others…
• and on and on….

I love getting and giving love.  It is like sunshine and water to a plant.

Law of Attraction: what we feel is what we vibrate… what we vibrate is what we attract

We all know human cactus’s.. cacti? They walk through their day like they are sucking on a lemon.  How much fun can that be?

Not me… If I were a house plant, I would sit in a sunny window, with a great view.  I would have regular spa treatments (water, fertilizer, misting, primping)  and I would bloom, bloom, bloom! The room would would be filled with my sweet fragrance and everyone who visited would come over to say hello… sounds like a nice life…(some days… lol…)

So, if you want love, make sure you give love… surprise people… be someone others look forward to spending time with!

And there you go… off to your day….

Here’s a hug…. ((((((((((you)))))))))

In a-bun-dance…

Joyce