Joyce Lee Life Coaching Moment

Forget love… I’d rather fall in chocolate!  ~ Author Unknown

Good Morning,

What if:

•    trans fat was good for us
•    cheese cake had the same calories as celery
•    we needed to drink 8 glasses of wine a day (just kidding, hiccup)
•    the food guide recommended 6 – 8 servings of chocolate a day…
•    deep fried foods were heart healthy
•    all those chemicals in our food were essential

What if belly fat was a good thing?

Wouldn’t that be just grand?

Hee-hee-hee

Joyce

The only time to eat diet food is while you’re waiting for the steak to cook. ~ Julia Child

I never met a popular fad diet that did me any good in the long term.

I could fill a page with the dates and names of the fad diets I went on in hope of having the perfect body.  I’ve know many a ‘Diet Monday.’

In fact, I think the numerous ones I went on in my long dieting career actually helped mess with my head and contribute to a very unhealthy relationship with food.

I subjected myself to:

Shame:  stepping on the scale and being weighed by a woman with a clipboard
Insanity: actually thinking that I can eat cabbage soup every day for the rest of my life
Blind Hope: maybe having my food mailed to me will really work
Desperation: I have to look good for my high school class reunion, here’s my $2500.00, sign me up!

What I want to know is who invents the fad diet anyway?  Is there a demographic?

Now that I am older and wiser (I hope), I chuckle at the infomercials promoting the latest and greatest fad…  I prefer the turtle approach: slow and steady wins the race…

What do you think?

When we lose twenty pounds… we may be losing the twenty best pounds we have!  We may be losing the pounds that contain our genius, our humanity, our love and honesty.  ~Woody Allen

As a solopreneur of not just one but two businesses, I can easily work 12 hours a day, 7 days a week working for and growing the businesses and I often do…

But it occurred to me, that under all the projects and busyness… my life is beautifully and intentionally simple and I love it that way…

For instance:

• I work from my home and go to town only twice a week.  I can take my ‘office’ (laptop) out onto the patio and work overlooking my horses, a pond while listening to the birds… simple
• I have a beautiful and simple food plan… unprocessed, whole, fresh foods… by the time grocery day rolls around, my fridge is empty… we only buy what we eat… simple…
• We walk almost every morning… simple…
• I let the answering machine pick up when I have my nap… simple… have a quiet house for a good portion of the day… radio off, TV off, music off… just quiet… simple…
• I am less and less attached to ’stuff’… less to dust… simple… I gave away my cookbook collection, my angel collection, ornaments… buying much less of what I merely “want” in favor for what I “need”  (still struggle with this in horse tack stores and bead stores… lol)

What about you?  Where have you simplified… Where would you like to simplify?

Wishing you enough…

Joyce

I recently attended a wedding for a family member. The wedding was attended by people I hadn’t seen in decades. I admit to needing gentle reminders of names with more than a few. Time had been kind to some and not so kind to others…

The thing that really struck me though, was the tendency of many women to immediately start self criticizing as soon as they greeted me.

“Oy vey… women can be soo hard on themselves sometimes.”

• Pointing out the signs of aging as if it was a crime
• Apologizing for their looks
  
• Minimizing accomplishments

As an avid ‘people-watcher’ and amateur sociologist, I created 2 general categories of women at the wedding.

1. Those who move through their life with self confidence, grace and poise
2. Those who do not

Both groups show it in everything from the clothes they choose, the way they walk, dance, laugh, interact and eat.

The experience gave me an opportunity to reflect on my own self confidence.  Being a typical middle aged woman in the ‘looks’ department, with my fair share of wrinkles, love handles and pesky unwanted chin hair (lol),  I  move through my life with confidence, grace and poise.

• I walk tall and freely… I love the way my body feels when I move, whether outside leading a horse or across a dance floor… I feel good… (shoes notwithstanding…)
• I wore a lovely lime green embroidered middle eastern sheer blouse with a  bright pink camisole… I felt exotic and mysterious… (gotta like that eh?)
• I chose simple food from the buffet that closely resembled the foods I normally eat,  and passed on the rest… (why… why… does so much have to be swimming in sauce… ewww)
• I love dancing (two stepping) with my wonderful husband… (hold me closer… mmm…)

I realized that wherever we go, we take ourselves with us…  My self confidence has come from all the personal work I have done to resolve and let go of my baggage and embrace my authentic power and beauty…  the confidence starts on the inside… and the outside reflects that…  (it’s an energy thing…)

I would love your thoughts on this…  where do you think power and poise and grace come from?

The wheel of the year has turned yet again, and the days are getting noticeably shorter. 2009 is more than half over.

The older I get, the more precious time is, and the more intent I become on living my life to it’s fullest.  I want to be happy, I see anything other than happiness a complete waste of my beautiful life. 

On that note, I would like to present you with a coaching challenge.

Remember to do this in a spirit of celebration, let go of the outcome, and just enjoy the process…

Challenge:

Take the time to sit today with a cup of tea and your journal and create a list of your highlights from the first half of 2009.

• What did you accomplish?
• Who did you love?
• What brought you joy?
• What did you learn?
• How did you grow?
• What were your special moments?

Take the time to look back with love… keep these snippets of “feel – good” energy close to you, think of them often.

Advanced Challenge: Up the voltage on the good energy.

If you really want to invite more goodness into your circumstances, pass this challenge to other select folks in you life.   Make it a point to talk about these loving things when you visit…

• What you think is what you feel
• What you feel is what you vibrate
• What you vibrate is what you attract

Take time to think about the love you have and share…

Use the Law of Attraction to invite more and more reasons to celebrate into your reality.

Isn’t it great how this works?

Peace and Love,

Joyce

Good Morning,

So, here we are… another day is stretched out before us…

Before we look at our self in the mirror again, let’s take a moment to think about the quality of observations we will make to the woman who is looking back at…

Will we criticize and judge her negatively, or will we smile and tell her that we are grateful and that we are glad to be her?

What will we plan to eat today? Have we given thought to balanced, nutritious meals for our self and our family?  Does the food that we keep in the house support a healthy food plan?

Our personal care: Are we going to take the time to dress and present our self in a way that feels good and self loving today?  Do we have self care products that make a positive statement about the care we think we deserve?

Money Matters: Will we respect our finances today?  Will we make wise choices that feel empowering?

Will we make time for some personal inner work? Time to connect with our Spirituality?  Time just for us…  or will we give it all away…

Here’s the thing… the better we treat our self, the better we will feel… the better we feel, the more we have to share with others… it’s the quintessential win-win…

I’m on my way to smile at the woman in the mirror…

Joyce

Good Morning,

I was just thinking about what contributes to ‘feel good’ day for me… I love hugs, and ‘I love you’ and teasing and attention.  My day just goes better when there is loving expression.

I realize that I need to take the time to extend my loving energy to others as well.

• tell others what I appreciate about them
• go out of my way to inquire about them
• listen, really listen to what others have to say
• take the time to joke around… life is supposed to be fun
• touch…  merging energy creates sparks…
• surprise people with interest for no other reason than to let them know they are important to me
• make time for chit chat… quit taking myself seriously…
• go out of my way for others…
• and on and on….

I love getting and giving love.  It is like sunshine and water to a plant.

Law of Attraction: what we feel is what we vibrate… what we vibrate is what we attract

We all know human cactus’s.. cacti? They walk through their day like they are sucking on a lemon.  How much fun can that be?

Not me… If I were a house plant, I would sit in a sunny window, with a great view.  I would have regular spa treatments (water, fertilizer, misting, primping)  and I would bloom, bloom, bloom! The room would would be filled with my sweet fragrance and everyone who visited would come over to say hello… sounds like a nice life…(some days… lol…)

So, if you want love, make sure you give love… surprise people… be someone others look forward to spending time with!

And there you go… off to your day….

Here’s a hug…. ((((((((((you)))))))))

In a-bun-dance…

Joyce

I was a queen in the kingdom of Emotional Turmoil.

Emotional Turmoil:  a recovery term meaning

• the junk talk of your Inner Critic,
• the sinking feeling in your heart that something is wrong
• the constant unrest inside,
• the going over and over and over your problems
• the monkey on your back
• waking up feeling uneasy
• physical symptoms associated with emotional causes (blood pressure, stress, anxiety etc…)

Oh… I knew these well… my inner self was in turmoil although I had many, many blessings in my life…  there was a disconnect between my blessings and my feelings of self worth and esteem.

If you identify yourself as having Emotional Turmoil, please know that you can change… you probably have some inner personal growth work to do:

• cleaning up the debris from your past
• forgiving who needs to be forgiven, even your Self
• quitting any whining and victim behaviors
• resolving what needs to be resolved
• taking responsibility for the quality of your life
• getting out of the passenger’s seat and sitting behind the driver’s wheel of your life
• intending to claim your power
• doing your work
• deciding that you came here to be happy because it’s waiting for you
• asking for help…
• educating yourself in the language of personal development

Taking my head out of the sand, gathering up my courage and finding the willingness to experience a new way of living my life was a huge challenge… no doubt about it… but I did it… many women I know did it and many are doing it right now…

So, if this resonates with you and you know that feeling of inner turmoil… and are at the crossroads of doing what you have always done or rolling your sleeves up and doing it differently… know that you don’t have to do it alone… everyone can benefit from help…

I don’t usually promote my private coaching but in this case, I invite you to contact me if you want support getting started on your path of change… I have developed several ways to coach/support clients.  Helping women refocus and start waking up happy by using the Law of Attraction is my specialty…  my email is info@joyceleelifecoach.com

Life is supposed to be joyful… it is a complete waste of time to suffer…

Wishing you wellness… inner and outer… today and always…

Joyce

The Law of Attraction states that you get what you focus on whether you want it or not.

Ever notice how the more we ’stew’ about a problem, the more we stay stuck in it, and once we start to think solution, possibilities, we become unstuck?  It took me years and years to figure this out…

I spent years yearning for a slim body but focused on everything I didn’t like about my obese body…

If we continue to keep our attention on what we don’t want or like, we are essentially sending out a universal invitation for more of the same.

• I couldn’t attract slim when focused on fat
• We can’t attract abundance if we are focused on lack.
• We  can’t attract wellness if we are focused on illness.
• We  can’t attract happiness if we are focused on feeling bad.
• We  can’t attract inner peace if we are focused on criticism and blame.

So, what are you focused on today?  This moment?  Is your focus going to bring you what you want?

All positive change begins with a positive shift in perspective.

• What do we want?
• How would it feel to get what we want?

Don’t do things bass ackwards… you won’t like what you keep manifesting…

Sometimes I get taken aback by the bigness of people’s lives and the struggles they face on a daily basis.  How do you use the Law of Attraction when you are in the middle of a difficult reality?… How do you change when you are limited by circumstances beyond your control?  Where is the hope when things seem hopeless?

Lisa sent this reply to my last post entitled Thoughts on Food and Food for Thought.  I am going to offer this to our counsel of loving, strong and wise women and we will wrap Lisa in our loving support.  No one is alone… all you have to do is reach out… there are women all over the world who have your best in their hearts…

Lisa wrote:

“I had a horrible car accident not my fault 2 yrs ago, the culprit died with  no insurance  nothing,,I have tried to survive after being out of work for 9 months raising 3 small children, with a deadbeat dad..I am struggling trying to feed everyone,and macaroni and cheese is our food…I am very depressed, cannot excercise because of metal rods in my legs and crushed foot..my weight is now 275 lbs or so..I am so so depressed, please can anyone lift me up ?…and give me a boost ?..I work 12 hours shift at a hospital (unit clerk)…thank you..”

I’ll go first:

Good morning Lisa… first of all, thankyou for having the courage to share your story with us.  It can’t be easy to get up every day and do what you need to do for your children when you are feeling so heavily burdened… Here’s a hug to start this day… (((((((Lisa/Joyce)))))).

I don’t have your answers, but I want to share what I know from my own experiences and from what others have shared with me.  You have told us:

• You have small children to raise until they are adults
• You have physical limitations on what you are able to do

So… when a situation is what a situation is… the question becomes how are you going to walk through it?  As a woman of power or as a woman who sees herself as a victim?  There is a huge difference in the perspectives…

• Those girls could have lost you completely… thank the Powers That Be, that you are still here to model how to be a strong woman.  That’s your job description.  Whether it’s fair or not… you need to reclaim your power for both your sake and for theirs too… they are watching you.
• There are always small steps that can be taken that will feel empowering.  I am not going to tell you what to do but I will ask… what do you do/can you do on a daily basis that moves you forward?  What are your internal resources?
• There are external resources available to help with self esteem issues… for starters I recommend an online support group for your weight/health issues… it only takes a minute to check in online let someone reach out and hold your hand.  Go to Yahoo Groups and look at the huge lists… find one that is speaking your language… and connect. (I used to be as heavy if not heavier than you are now, and I have been connected to my online support group for 10 years or so… I still connect at least 5 times a week, it’s how I stay well)

Lisa, I am sending you unconditional love today… I will light a candle for you and hope that you keep reaching deep within yourself to that place of power and put your focus on strength and growth and happy…

Because what I know is this:

Change the inside and the outside has to change to keep up…

Brightest Blessings to you.

Joyce