Joyce Lee Life Coaching Moment

Good Morning…

Here is a nifty exercise that I like to do every day.  I would like to offer it to you…

It’s simple… Pick a word… any word… this word will keep you focused and anchored as you walk through this day…

You will know it when you see it… you can’t make a mistake with this exercise… and the great thing is… you get to pick another one tomorrow… how about that?

Serenity, Spirit, Inspiration, Peace, Love, Joy, Choice, Power, Friendliness, Share, Cherish, Appreciate, Laugh, Smile, Truth, Surrender, Tickle, Tease, Hug, Grace, Poise, Confidence, Worth, Value, Esteem, Acceptance, Create, Support, Communicate, Clarity, Positive, Dream, Deserve, Honesty, Passion, Health, Wellness, Grounded, Centered, Abundance, Receive, Blessings, Gratitude, Thanks, Manners, Authentic, Awakened, Empowered, Sage, Generous, Affirm, Approval, Acceptance, Tolerance, Patience, Connecting, Relax, Soft, Open, Flowing, Relax, Let It Be, Chill Out…

Pick one from the list that resonates with you or pick one of your own… the important thing is that you choose a positive lens through which to view your world…  you create what you choose…

Good Morning,

I was just thinking about what contributes to ‘feel good’ day for me… I love hugs, and ‘I love you’ and teasing and attention.  My day just goes better when there is loving expression.

I realize that I need to take the time to extend my loving energy to others as well.

• tell others what I appreciate about them
• go out of my way to inquire about them
• listen, really listen to what others have to say
• take the time to joke around… life is supposed to be fun
• touch…  merging energy creates sparks…
• surprise people with interest for no other reason than to let them know they are important to me
• make time for chit chat… quit taking myself seriously…
• go out of my way for others…
• and on and on….

I love getting and giving love.  It is like sunshine and water to a plant.

Law of Attraction: what we feel is what we vibrate… what we vibrate is what we attract

We all know human cactus’s.. cacti? They walk through their day like they are sucking on a lemon.  How much fun can that be?

Not me… If I were a house plant, I would sit in a sunny window, with a great view.  I would have regular spa treatments (water, fertilizer, misting, primping)  and I would bloom, bloom, bloom! The room would would be filled with my sweet fragrance and everyone who visited would come over to say hello… sounds like a nice life…(some days… lol…)

So, if you want love, make sure you give love… surprise people… be someone others look forward to spending time with!

And there you go… off to your day….

Here’s a hug…. ((((((((((you)))))))))

In a-bun-dance…

Joyce

I was a queen in the kingdom of Emotional Turmoil.

Emotional Turmoil:  a recovery term meaning

• the junk talk of your Inner Critic,
• the sinking feeling in your heart that something is wrong
• the constant unrest inside,
• the going over and over and over your problems
• the monkey on your back
• waking up feeling uneasy
• physical symptoms associated with emotional causes (blood pressure, stress, anxiety etc…)

Oh… I knew these well… my inner self was in turmoil although I had many, many blessings in my life…  there was a disconnect between my blessings and my feelings of self worth and esteem.

If you identify yourself as having Emotional Turmoil, please know that you can change… you probably have some inner personal growth work to do:

• cleaning up the debris from your past
• forgiving who needs to be forgiven, even your Self
• quitting any whining and victim behaviors
• resolving what needs to be resolved
• taking responsibility for the quality of your life
• getting out of the passenger’s seat and sitting behind the driver’s wheel of your life
• intending to claim your power
• doing your work
• deciding that you came here to be happy because it’s waiting for you
• asking for help…
• educating yourself in the language of personal development

Taking my head out of the sand, gathering up my courage and finding the willingness to experience a new way of living my life was a huge challenge… no doubt about it… but I did it… many women I know did it and many are doing it right now…

So, if this resonates with you and you know that feeling of inner turmoil… and are at the crossroads of doing what you have always done or rolling your sleeves up and doing it differently… know that you don’t have to do it alone… everyone can benefit from help…

I don’t usually promote my private coaching but in this case, I invite you to contact me if you want support getting started on your path of change… I have developed several ways to coach/support clients.  Helping women refocus and start waking up happy by using the Law of Attraction is my specialty…  my email is info@joyceleelifecoach.com

Life is supposed to be joyful… it is a complete waste of time to suffer…

Wishing you wellness… inner and outer… today and always…

Joyce

The Law of Attraction states that you get what you focus on whether you want it or not.

Ever notice how the more we ’stew’ about a problem, the more we stay stuck in it, and once we start to think solution, possibilities, we become unstuck?  It took me years and years to figure this out…

I spent years yearning for a slim body but focused on everything I didn’t like about my obese body…

If we continue to keep our attention on what we don’t want or like, we are essentially sending out a universal invitation for more of the same.

• I couldn’t attract slim when focused on fat
• We can’t attract abundance if we are focused on lack.
• We  can’t attract wellness if we are focused on illness.
• We  can’t attract happiness if we are focused on feeling bad.
• We  can’t attract inner peace if we are focused on criticism and blame.

So, what are you focused on today?  This moment?  Is your focus going to bring you what you want?

All positive change begins with a positive shift in perspective.

• What do we want?
• How would it feel to get what we want?

Don’t do things bass ackwards… you won’t like what you keep manifesting…

Sometimes I get taken aback by the bigness of people’s lives and the struggles they face on a daily basis.  How do you use the Law of Attraction when you are in the middle of a difficult reality?… How do you change when you are limited by circumstances beyond your control?  Where is the hope when things seem hopeless?

Lisa sent this reply to my last post entitled Thoughts on Food and Food for Thought.  I am going to offer this to our counsel of loving, strong and wise women and we will wrap Lisa in our loving support.  No one is alone… all you have to do is reach out… there are women all over the world who have your best in their hearts…

Lisa wrote:

“I had a horrible car accident not my fault 2 yrs ago, the culprit died with  no insurance  nothing,,I have tried to survive after being out of work for 9 months raising 3 small children, with a deadbeat dad..I am struggling trying to feed everyone,and macaroni and cheese is our food…I am very depressed, cannot excercise because of metal rods in my legs and crushed foot..my weight is now 275 lbs or so..I am so so depressed, please can anyone lift me up ?…and give me a boost ?..I work 12 hours shift at a hospital (unit clerk)…thank you..”

I’ll go first:

Good morning Lisa… first of all, thankyou for having the courage to share your story with us.  It can’t be easy to get up every day and do what you need to do for your children when you are feeling so heavily burdened… Here’s a hug to start this day… (((((((Lisa/Joyce)))))).

I don’t have your answers, but I want to share what I know from my own experiences and from what others have shared with me.  You have told us:

• You have small children to raise until they are adults
• You have physical limitations on what you are able to do

So… when a situation is what a situation is… the question becomes how are you going to walk through it?  As a woman of power or as a woman who sees herself as a victim?  There is a huge difference in the perspectives…

• Those girls could have lost you completely… thank the Powers That Be, that you are still here to model how to be a strong woman.  That’s your job description.  Whether it’s fair or not… you need to reclaim your power for both your sake and for theirs too… they are watching you.
• There are always small steps that can be taken that will feel empowering.  I am not going to tell you what to do but I will ask… what do you do/can you do on a daily basis that moves you forward?  What are your internal resources?
• There are external resources available to help with self esteem issues… for starters I recommend an online support group for your weight/health issues… it only takes a minute to check in online let someone reach out and hold your hand.  Go to Yahoo Groups and look at the huge lists… find one that is speaking your language… and connect. (I used to be as heavy if not heavier than you are now, and I have been connected to my online support group for 10 years or so… I still connect at least 5 times a week, it’s how I stay well)

Lisa, I am sending you unconditional love today… I will light a candle for you and hope that you keep reaching deep within yourself to that place of power and put your focus on strength and growth and happy…

Because what I know is this:

Change the inside and the outside has to change to keep up…

Brightest Blessings to you.

Joyce

I think the friendships I hold near and dear to my heart help to define me. I have heard it said that we are the average of the 5 friends we spend the most time with.  I really thought about that…

I love the 5 friends that I spend the most time with and am proud to be the average of them…

Friendships are like tapestries… woven of individual strands of texture and color, they show us the quality of our self esteem and self confidence.  Friends should bring out the best in us and we should help them glow as well…

The picture was taken at my 50th birthday party last year… these are some of my closest women friends… smart, confident and fun women (that’s me with my smart, confident and fun horse nibbling my hat:)) … I am honored to be their friend…

• Have you ever asked your friends how they would describe you?
• Are you aware of the roles each of you play in the relationship?
• What do you bring to the table?

If you want to read the complete article I wrote on this topic  make sure you are subscribed to Notes to Self, my bi-weekly newsletter… there is a little sign up box right here on this page… the issue comes out tomorrow, May 12…

In friendship…

How many partially read ‘self-improvement’ books do you own, how many journals have you started only to put down and not pick up again?

I have come to realize that on the days I consciously spend time on prayer, some form of meditation and personal reflection, I feel good.  On the days that I neglect my inner peace, I don’t feel as great.  I don’t have the same grounding, the same focus… I become focused on what is happening ‘out there’ rather than ‘in here‘.

Just as staying fit physically requires determination and discipline, so too does staying spiritually and emotionally fit.  Very little is gained if you approach either on a haphazard basis.

“Regular” means habitual, routine, normal, established.  Like any lifestyle change, the best way to approach your inner work, is to keep it simple and to keep doing it.

You really don’t need to own every self-help book on the market all at once.  Keep it about quality rather than quantity… better one or two dearly loved and deeply relevant volumes with bookmarks, dog ears, highlighter and notes all over than dozens and dozens of books that have barely been glanced at…Read only those that truly resonate with you, put a ribbon around the others and either give them away or put them on a shelf and just let them be.  Keep it simple and keep it powerful.

Allow your journal to be a companion for daily self-reflection and exploration.  Create a beautiful space and a quiet time for this wonderful journey.

Make your inner journey enjoyable… it is enjoyable… you deserve quality time with yourself… the more connected you feel with your self, the richer your ‘out there’ experience will be…

trust me on this…

Hmmmm…. what should I attract today?  Should I attract worry?  If I want that, maybe I should listen to the news all day… let it sink in… yup, that would do it… I would get bummed out…

Should I attract pissy?  If I want to do that, maybe I could talk to people about how bad things are going in the world right now… I could share some of the stories that made me worried when I listened to the news… yeah… that would work…

Naaaa…. I think I’ll go with happy instead… I’ll notice what is right in my world…See what happens…

• the sun is shining
• the geese have returned, welcome… welcome…
• I have a lovely home filled with conveniences and comfort
• I have a strong and supportive life partner who loves me
• I am deeply connected to my Higher Power
• My pantry is filled with nourishing foods
• My riding season has arrived
  
• I have the freedom to go anywhere I want today
• My friends and family are grounded and healthy
• I have abundance to share
• I have lots of inspiration to create beauty
• My underwear drawer is full
• I am inspired to make a difference in the world
• My heart is open and loving

Hmmm… I wonder what I will attract today?

I will get what I focus on whether I want it or not…

think > feel > vibrate > attract.

And you?  Are you taking responsibility for your attraction today?

The other day, I had an opportunity to share an experience I had years ago.  It’s a juicy story… loaded with imagery and interesting twists and turns. The antagonist in my story is the kind of woman who is just asking to be disliked and criticized… With each past telling, I would get swept away with righteous indignation and feel victimized all over again.

Looking back , I always felt a bit itchy when I shared that experience… Something about the way I told it seemed sensationalistic and a bit dishonest.  I think I struggled with my motives for telling about it in the first place.  I really painted the other woman as a troll… and truth be told… she isn’t a troll at all… she… just like me… was doing the best she could with what she had to work with.  If I am to be completely honest, I wanted my audience to side with me and not like the other woman.

I guess I’ve grown up…

The other day, when I told the same story, I told it from a completely different perspective.  I saw it as a life lesson about being young and tender and easily bruised.  None of the old feelings of anger and blame showed up… I felt completely at peace.  A life lesson.  A teacher and a student.

I wonder if the other woman has evolved too?  Has she done her inner work?  Is she reaching towards being a better person?  Does she remember?  Does she wish me peace?

Where ever she is… I have forgiven her, and forgiven myself too for my part… I am free of any negative bond that existed between us… I wish her well on her journey…

That story has a happy ending…

What about you?  Have you experienced this type of growth? I would love to hear about it….

Nancy is struggling with maintaining a positive attitude in the middle of a negative home environment with the people she loves… she is asking for help…

I would like to offer some thoughts and insight into how the Law of Attraction applies and we’ll take it from there…

Thoughts and Insights:

• We get what we focus on whether we want it or not… so if the normal environment in our home is negative and we spend a lot of time pushing against each other, we will feel frustrated or angry and vibrate frustrated and angry and attract more to be frustrated and angry about… think > feel > vibrate > attract
• We cant change anyone else. We all know that… but we need to accept it… we can’t change anyone else, or create in their reality… it is a waste of energy.  bummer eh?
• No one else can change us or create in our reality either… We are 100% responsible for our personal vibration… If we want to change, we must change what we spend our time thinking about…
• What would inner peace look like? Just suppose no-one else changes, and just suppose that we choose to stay in the same environment… what would we like to feel like on a daily basis?…. hmmm….
• What kind of focus would we need in order to feel inner peace? Now that we are deliberately taking our focus off our problems, and the negativity of others, what are we going to put our focus on?
• The more time we spend working on our self, our positive attitude, our positive self image…. we change… when we change on the inside, things change on the outside…

Ok…. NOW we are getting somewhere…  So… it all comes down to being about me… me… me….

• My focus, my inner peace…my many blessings…
• What do I love… what am I grateful for?
• How spiritually fit am I?
• What inner work do I need to do?
• Where is my journal?
• How do I look after myself?
• How do I treat me?
• What do I want?
• I want to spend time with positive people
• I want to stop talking about problems, stop giving them attention

So… these are some quick insights to the process of inner peace… In my humble opinion… it really is all about you Nancy… Just take your focus off of the inner peace of others and put it on the inner peace of your self…  see what happens…

You were born to be happy… you deserve to be happy… it is never too late to change your life…